HEALTH TIPS: HOW TO BE A MATURE ADULT.
Most of us have witnessed the pitiful sight of a group of drunken, middle-aged men at an office party, making crude jokes and behaving childishly. And the other hand we have seen young people who have reached astonishing levels of maturity.
Young people are trying to work out who they are. As they grow, they try different identities. one moment they are a gloomy Goth, then an angry. Defiant parents often find this tiresome and irritating. But it is natural and should never be ridiculed.
Adult occasionally changes their style as well. But there is a difference. In youth, these identities are serious. Being an adult means knowing who you are beneath the various styles and masks.
Maturity means accepting just how fragile, fleeting and insignificant your life really is.
Idealism and intolerance: young people are often idealistic. They seem to believe that their generation alone understands what is wrong with the world and how it should be put right . of course, idealism is fine up to a point. Believing in such abstract concepts as justice, liberty, and equality motivate people to do much in the world.
Relationships: Nothing reveals someone’s level of maturity more than their relationships with other human beings. Mature people find it easy to love. They give it freely and unconditionally. But they are also self-sufficient and aware that they could be content on their own.
A mature individual would never say “you are the only one in the world for me.” They know that this is simple, not true. They also know that all relationships are ultimately temporary.
Death and Bereavement: The mature do not live in denial. They face up to the brief, transient nature of life. Many people cannot do this. Rationally, they know that they and the people they love will one day, but subconsciously they refuse to accept it. When death occurs, mature people grieve deeply and suffer profoundly. But they are also able to recover and move on, instead of responding with bitter outrage and self-pity.
Maturity involves many things, but if it had to be reduced to a thing that would be realism. Everyone carries a model of reality in their head. In a mature person, this internal model closely resembles actual reality. They are self-aware and realistic about both their own capacities and limitations and those of other people. Life is hard and most people use some kind of defense.
The immature either escape into fantasy, play the victim, or project their suffering on to others. Mature people are too realistic and self-aware to fall for this.
Their defence is outward looking, and they cope through irony, humour, and compassion.
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